so there is this blog i follow called Sleep Talkin' Man. It is hilarious. This British guy talks in his sleep and his wife records what he says. His asleep self is the complete opposite of his awake self. I've compiled some of my faves. heres the link for the blog: www.sleeptalkinman.blogspot.com
"Well, so what you call me fat. I'll forget you even existed the next time I see a donut."
"Is it a bird. Is it-oh. It's Koala Man. Asleep in the branches again, and probably pissed. What an embarrassment to superhero-kind."
pissed=drunk
"Finger painting's fun. I need to get some more fingers, though. Give me your fingers. I'll just cut 'em off. You've got pretty fingers. I can do some pretty paintings with those pretty fingers. Toes, I can use toes! Yay! I'm sorted. Fingers and toes."
"Nobody told me I couldn't bring that to tea. Why can't I bring it to tea? I'm really sorry to have upset you. It's not my fault. I thought it was okay. I did. Oh. It's not fair. It's not fair. You're trying to spoil my fun. Go on. I'm taking the iguana home. It's the last time you're gonna let your little chicks run around free!"
igauna?? :)
"You speak your mind, I punch your face. I think it's a fair exchange. We'll both be hurting."
"The cake! It must be psychic. Its using Jedi mind tricks to make itself irrestitable to me. This is the cake I want. I must have the soft icing."
"I've got a horrible urge to catch tuna in your stockings. Sustainably, of course. "
what does this even mean?
"Ho ch-...Ho chee...Ho chee na na na na na ....na na na na...oh boy am I glad I got that off my chest...I feel so better now."
"Talk once more and I will sue you for ear abuse. Shame on you! Shame! Auraphile."
"He's the king of clowns. You can tell by the nose. (whisper) It's always by the nose."
"I'm sorry. I'm gonna have to bag up all my nasal hair. It'll take me hours, but it will be worth it."
It only takes me a few minutes to do that. hmm. weird.
"Yeah, I'm shapely. I'm a great big gorgeous shape and lovin it."
^this is a quote I will live by.
that's all. I'm tired, and I could write these down all night...:)
haha oh my gosh! I follow sleep talkin man too! It makes my day sometimes! I always want to repeat the things he says but no one would know what I was talking about and think that I was crazy!
ReplyDeleteOne of my favorites:
"Butt cheeks ahoy! There she blows! You know, you can't be a pirate if you haven't got a beard. I said so. MY boat, MY rules."